Call the sitter. Make sure to plan little escapes regularly, with your baby daddy to reminisce and re-enact the life you guys had before he knocked you up. Pretend you’re dating again. Make out. Here are […]

Call the sitter. Make sure to plan little escapes regularly, with your baby daddy to reminisce and re-enact the life you guys had before he knocked you up. Pretend you’re dating again. Make out. Here are […]
Stop lying about your age. Be proud of your life experiences- the good and the bad- and stop putting expensive plastic all over your face to hide them.
This is an advice blog. Now that I’m 40 and a mom- my social life has become akin to ordering a custom sofa from Italy. I have a 12-16 week lead time. #designerjoke. I have different sitters I use who I like […]
Maybe it’s because I’m aging. Maybe it’s because I have permanent #mommybrain. Maybe I have enjoyed one too many good times with Mary and Bud. Whatever the case is- my short term memory totally #lameblows (that’s Victor’s new […]
High season in Miami means low season for me. My body still seems to think I’m in Canada because as soon as November hits- the urge to pass out at 7pm comes over me and […]
I suck at homework. Growing up, after school I wanted nothing more than to sit on the phone with my bestie Katrina S. We were 12 and had super major executive-level important shit to talk about […]
Remember in high school when cowboy boots, Gap jean jackets, baby-doll dresses and bangs where the shitttt? You know you rocked this look hard. You were eager to adopt the wardrobe of your fave 90210 […]
The other day I was at the park and I overheard a mother scolding her boy for repeatedly saying “poop” and “pee”. I have also heard parents scolding their children for saying “butt” and “penis”, […]
This may go against everything that this blog, albeit early in its existence, stands for- but let is serve to show that despite my profanity fueled rants, that I am really a nice mom who […]
i’m the odd mom out. i don’t do playdates. i value my time alone and i say ‘fuck’. alot. my kids think i’m A+++++ cool and that i’m funnier than daddy. that spells success in my parenting […]